TuxedoTranslations

Chapter 31

Old Zhuang, of course, didn’t actually touch him, but he did offer an approving nod.

“Well done, this physique is solid—strong and capable!”

Old Zhuang reminisced about earlier that year when he had to erect a greenhouse and struggled for ages to move a particularly large log into place. Age had caught up with him; his strength wasn’t what it used to be.

Seeing that Old Zhuang had no intention of “testing” further, Wen Chenxi felt like he had narrowly escaped the gates of hell. He stood there, dazed, as if in a dream.

He wanted to say that his whole body had gone stiff.

Truly stiff.

Old Zhuang, blissfully unaware of Wen Chenxi’s internal turmoil, cheerfully encouraged Zhuang Xianyu: “Xiao Shi, you should work on building up your strength, too. Aim for a physique like Xiao Wen’s—it’s good for your health!”

Zhuang Xianyu replied, “When I get back from my next trip, I’ll start training with Ah Xi.”

He studied Wen Chenxi’s proportions with eyes as precise as a laser scanner. Thanks to his knack for numbers, he quickly rattled off exact measurements. “I’ll train to be even stronger than Ah Xi.”

Wen Chenxi: “That’s not…” necessary.

Old Zhuang beamed. “Good! Then you’ll be able to help your dad carry saplings!”

Zhuang Xianyu: “But I can already carry saplings.”

Those were small ones, bundles of no more than 50 or 60 pounds at most.

Old Zhuang glanced at his thin arms and legs. “Better wait until you’re built like Xiao Wen before tackling the bigger jobs.”

Zhuang Xianyu: “I’m confident.”

Old Zhuang: “I have faith in you.”

Father and son exchanged a look of mutual understanding, each smiling faintly as if they had struck a deal.

Their smiles left Wen Chenxi feeling inexplicably uneasy.

He had to interrupt their silent agreement. “Xiao Yu, when you say you’ll train to be better than me… what exactly do you mean?”

Zhuang Xianyu answered, “If we’re talking numbers, I’d aim for a chest measurement between 120cm and 130cm.”

Old Zhuang nodded. “That’s a solid build.”

Zhuang Xianyu continued, “Waist, 85cm to 90cm.”

Old Zhuang approved. “Good, strong core for bending over and farming a whole acre.”

Zhuang Xianyu: “Hips, 100cm. No range needed.”

Old Zhuang shook his head. “Can’t comment on that—never paid attention to such things.”

Zhuang Xianyu went on, “For biceps, 45cm to 50cm. Natural fitness can bring them to 55cm to 60cm, but anything beyond that looks disproportionate.”

Old Zhuang added, “Let’s cap it at 50cm. Xiao Shi still needs to stay handsome.”

Zhuang Xianyu quickly rattled off more dimensions: neck, thighs, calves—his precision was terrifying.

When Wen Chenxi pieced together the described physique, it dawned on him: the result was a human embodiment of a muscle-bound action hero straight out of an American racing film.

Wen Chenxi: “…”

He struggled to breathe. “Isn’t this a bit much?”

The Zhuang father and son duo looked at him simultaneously, their expressions seeming to ask: What’s wrong with it? These numbers, when combined, clearly represented a healthy and strong physique.

Especially Old Zhuang—he was rather envious. It was the ideal build for farming.

Unlike now, as he aged and spent his days tending to various seedlings, he didn’t have the time or energy to train himself to that level. But Xiao Shi was still young, and he had the opportunity. Old Zhuang was fully supportive.

Wen Chenxi wanted to say more, but a voice came from outside:

“Why are you all standing here?”

It was Uncle Zhou, who had come to check on them since they hadn’t come out for a while.

Old Zhuang suddenly remembered why he had come into the room. Slapping his forehead, he laughed heartily. “Oh right, Xiao Shi, everyone has brought gifts for you. They’re on the table. Go take a look!”

Zhuang Xianyu: “Okay.”

The three of them left the inner room together.

The gifts were piled on the table, while the long bamboo bench where the throw pillows had been was now occupied by Li Xi and Ji Zhiyuan.

The others quickly noticed that, unlike the cheerful Zhuang father and son, Wen Chenxi’s expression was unusually grim.

Li Xi, concerned for his friend, quietly asked after Wen Chenxi walked over, “What happened? Confession rejected? Or did Uncle Zhuang find out about something?”

Wen Chenxi glanced at him, his face impassive. “No.”

Honestly, he would’ve preferred if Uncle Zhuang had misunderstood something.

So, nothing happened? Then why did Old Wen look like this?

Li Xi lowered his voice further. “Then?”

Wen Chenxi: “Xiao Yu wants to work out.”

Li Xi said, “That’s great, isn’t it? You two can train together, bond over it, and it’s good for your health.”

After all, in Li Xi’s opinion, men exuded the most allure when working out, their hormones practically radiating.

Wen Chenxi added, “He wants to train to look like a muscular Barbie.”

Li Xi: “…”

Wen Chenxi didn’t think his analogy was an exaggeration. Zhuang Xianyu had a small, delicate face, and if he built a physique like the one he just described, combined with his current refined features, wouldn’t he essentially become a muscular Barbie?

Li Xi remained silent for a while, glancing at Zhuang Xianyu, who had just sat down. It was impossible to imagine this handsome young man turning into someone with an exaggeratedly muscular build.

After a minute of silence, Li Xi finally found the words, patted Wen Chenxi’s shoulder sympathetically, and uttered that universal comfort phrase:

“You’ve got it rough.”

Wen Chenxi: “…”

Meanwhile, Zhuang Xianyu had sat down at the table, where over ten gift boxes were stacked.

He was a little puzzled. Weren’t the only ones celebrating his birthday the people here? How were there so many gifts?

Ji Zhiyuan, seated nearby, teased him, “Xiao Yu, guess what I got you this time?”

Recalling Ji Zhiyuan’s previous gifts, Zhuang Xianyu said, “Cufflinks, watches, things like that?”

After all, Ji Zhiyuan had once given him cufflinks, which Zhuang Xianyu categorized as decorative yet somewhat cumbersome items.

Not that he disliked such gifts. He appreciated anything given to him, even if it was something he wouldn’t use.

After all, this kind of experience was something he had never known while working as a  chip—especially the joy of unwrapping a gift box himself.

Ji Zhiyuan grinned proudly. “Nope, this time, I got you something you’ll definitely like!”

When buying the gift, Wen Chenxi had specifically reminded him to choose something Zhuang Xianyu could actually use.

At first, Ji Zhiyuan thought, Why wouldn’t cufflinks be practical? Weren’t they necessary for business meetings and grand banquets?

But then he realized Zhuang Xianyu wasn’t like them; he didn’t need to attend banquets at all.

Ji Zhiyuan genuinely regarded Zhuang Xianyu as a friend. With Wen Chenxi’s advice in mind, he thought it over and eventually came up with the perfect gift.

He picked out his gift and placed it in front of Zhuang Xianyu. “Here, these are from me. Open them first.”

Zhuang Xianyu: “Oh, thanks.”

No wonder there were so many gifts—Ji Zhiyuan alone had contributed quite a few.

Zhuang Xianyu began unboxing.

After unwrapping all of Ji Zhiyuan’s boxes, he ended up with six pairs of shoes, six pairs of socks, and six pairs of insoles.

The shoes were all highly sought-after limited editions, while the socks and insoles were plain white with bold logos, as if afraid people wouldn’t know they were luxury brands.

Ji Zhiyuan eagerly asked, “So? Do you like them?”

After all, Old Wen had said to gift Zhuang Xianyu something he could use. Shoes were definitely usable, right?

He had practically taken care of Zhuang Xianyu’s footwear needs for an entire year!

Initially, he only planned to buy one pair.

But one pair of shoes was too cheap in his eyes—not even a tenth of the cost of cufflinks.

Ji Zhiyuan felt it was too insubstantial, so he went all out and bought more.

Zhuang Xianyu nodded. “Thanks, I like them.”

Ji Zhiyuan pressed further. “Haven’t you noticed? These three things together make something special.”

Zhuang Xianyu asked, “What is it?”

Ji Zhiyuan arranged the shoes, socks, and insoles together and said, “666!”

Everyone else: “…”

Zhuang Xianyu: “Oh, so that’s it. That is pretty unique.”

According to online data, humans tended to favor auspicious numbers like 666, 888, and 999. These combinations were universally well-received.

Old Zhuang sincerely thanked Ji Zhiyuan. “Thank you, Xiao Ji. You’re very thoughtful.”

Ji Zhiyuan beamed proudly. “This gift is quite creative, isn’t it?”

Even Li Xi couldn’t bring himself to mock him: So tacky.

Compared to Ji Zhiyuan’s unconventional gift, Li Xi’s gift was much more proper. His family ran a luxury goods business, specializing in high-end tailored suits and formal wear, most of which required pre-ordering.

Of course, they also offered casual wear, albeit in limited quantities.

Li Xi chose to gift several sets of casual attire—clothes that were perfectly appropriate for work but made from premium fabrics with exceptional comfort.

Zhuang Yanyu’s physique, tall and lean, was the ideal frame for showcasing clothing. As long as the height was known, any outfit would fit him like a model’s. With this in mind, Li Xi didn’t even ask for Zhuang Yanyu’s specific measurements, confident that his selections would suit him flawlessly.

After opening Uncle Zhou’s gift, Zhuang Yanyu thanked everyone politely, demonstrating impeccable manners. This was the first lesson the transmigration system taught him: to learn human etiquette.

Ji Zhiyuan, however, noticed that among the gifts, Wen Chenxi’s was missing. He couldn’t resist asking, “Old Wen! I don’t see your gift for Xiaoyu. Don’t tell me you forgot! Xiaoyu, feel free to punch him!”

Old Zhuang quickly interjected, “I told him not to. He just gifted Xiaoshi a house, and taking more gifts wouldn’t seem right.”

Wen Chenxi naturally wouldn’t dare disobey Old Zhuang, so this time, he didn’t buy anything extra. However, what Old Zhuang didn’t know was that Wen Chenxi had made a large donation to an orphanage in Zhuang Yanyu’s name as a birthday present.

Zhuang Yanyu carefully put away all the gifts, treasuring them as he placed them in a large wooden chest that Old Zhuang had specially crafted for him. He only took out two pairs of shoes, socks, and a few outfits, planning to rotate them, while saving the rest until his current items wore out.

The others observed this and couldn’t help but think to themselves how Zhuang Yanyu, in his simplicity and frugality, was truly Old Zhuang’s son through and through.

When no one was paying attention, Zhuang Yanyu leaned close to Wen Chenxi’s ear and whispered, “Ah Xi, don’t worry. Even though I like the gifts they gave, I still like your pillow the best.”

His tone was sincere, like a loyal harem member declaring undying devotion to their favorite.

The ever-pillow-loathing Wen Chenxi: “…”

Seriously, there was no need to like it that much.

After a brief rest in the afternoon, Uncle Zhou decided to accompany Old Zhuang to the experimental fields. Ji Zhiyuan, initially planning to continue fishing, grew curious when he overheard their plans and eagerly suggested joining them. He even dragged Wen Chenxi along.

Old Zhuang cheerfully led the way.

Familiar with every plant, Old Zhuang could explain the origins, uses, and even medicinal properties of any plant they encountered. It was as if he were a walking plant encyclopedia, with no gaps in his knowledge.

Wen Chenxi and the others were secretly impressed. No wonder Uncle Zhou held Old Zhuang in such high regard—he truly was extraordinary.

How many books must one read, and how much research must one do, to remember the history and value of every plant so clearly?

Trailing behind, Zhuang Yanyu showed no surprise, as if his father’s brilliance were entirely expected.

In retrospect, it made sense.

While Zhuang Yanyu hadn’t inherited Old Zhuang’s knack for farming, he had his own remarkable talents. They simply weren’t in the same field.

As they walked, Wen Chenxi deliberately slowed his pace, causing Zhuang Yanyu to match his leisurely rhythm.

The late August sun in the south was still unbearably hot, but the shade provided by the trees along the path brought a cool respite to the afternoon.

Strolling lazily side by side, the two began to enjoy the tranquility of the moment. Wen Chenxi suddenly understood why Ji Zhiyuan loved visiting this rural retreat.

The mountains, the water, and the people were all lovely, and even the air seemed fresher than in the city.

Wen Chenxi turned his head, gazing at the boy walking beside him. The golden sunlight cast a halo over Zhuang Yanyu, as if the sun itself were declaring to everyone nearby, “Look at this boy—how radiant he is.”

Wen Chenxi smiled faintly, amused by his own thoughts.

Zhuang Yanyu suddenly turned back, his puzzled gaze meeting Wen Chenxi’s directly.

He touched his own face and asked, “Is there something on my face?”

Wen Chenxi continued looking at him. “No.”

“Then why are you staring at me?”

Wen Chenxi didn’t answer the question. Instead, he asked, “Xiaoyu, it’s your birthday today. Do you have a wish?”

Zhuang Yanyu shook his head. “No.”

“Nothing you want?”

Though Wen Chenxi hadn’t given a material gift, he hoped to fulfill any wish Zhuang Yanyu might have.

But Zhuang Yanyu shook his head again. “I already have everything I want.”

He had gained a human form, a good friend, and no longer lived the days of calculating tasks and hoarding points with a host. For him, this slow and leisurely life was perfection.

Wen Chenxi sighed softly, poking Zhuang Yanyu’s dimple. “Why are you so easy to satisfy?”

Zhuang Yanyu caught his hand to stop the poking and, holding it tightly, explained earnestly, “I mean it. I’m genuinely happy with my life now.”

Wen Chenxi smiled slightly. “Alright. But if there’s anything you want in the future, be sure to tell me.”

Zhuang Yanyu thought for a moment, remembering Wen Chenxi’s earlier insistence not to refuse him, and agreed, “Okay.”

As the two walked and chatted, Zhuang Yanyu held Wen Chenxi’s hand, not letting go.

It seemed he was already accustomed to such physical contact and didn’t find anything unusual about walking hand-in-hand with Wen Chenxi.

Noticing that they had fallen too far behind Old Zhuang, Zhuang Yanyu quickened his pace while still holding onto Wen Chenxi’s hand.

They passed by Li Xi and Ji Zhiyuan, who were also walking leisurely and enjoying the scenery.

When the two saw Zhuang Yanyu and Wen Chenxi approaching, hand in hand, they both froze for a moment.

Li Xi glanced at Wen Chenxi in mild surprise, silently signaling with his eyes: So bold? Aren’t you afraid of being misunderstood?

Wen Chenxi remained calm and composed, allowing them to look as much as they pleased.

Zhuang Yanyu, for his part, didn’t sense anything odd. He even cast a puzzled glance at Li Xi, asking, “What’s wrong?”

Li Xi cleared his throat awkwardly. “Ahem, nothing. Just curious… why are you two walking so slowly?”

Zhuang Yanyu replied matter-of-factly, “Ah Xi walks slow, so I’m keeping him company.”

Wen Chenxi smiled faintly.

He had thought this “fish” hadn’t noticed him deliberately slowing down.

Since it was already obvious, he openly admitted, “Yes, I was walking slower.”

Ji Zhiyuan gave him a look of disdain. “Old Wen, are you getting old and losing your energy?”

Pausing, his gaze shifted to their clasped hands, his disdain intensifying. “And you even need Xiaoyu to hold your hand? Your stamina must be terrible—hitting menopause already?”

Wen Chenxi shot him a glance. “Shut your mouth.”

Ignoring Ji Zhiyuan, Wen Chenxi exerted a slight force, pulling Zhuang Yanyu around the two of them. “Let’s go.”

Ji Zhiyuan watched their retreating figures and clicked his tongue twice. “Not even letting me talk about it.”

Li Xi chuckled. “I think Old Wen is right—you’re always running your mouth.”

Ji Zhiyuan wasn’t convinced. “But am I wrong? Look, they’re still holding hands…”

The longer Ji Zhiyuan watched, the more goosebumps he felt creeping up his skin.

It wasn’t even cold, yet he shivered slightly and muttered, “How are those two so clingy?”

–

At the front, Old Zhuang was chatting with Zhou Baishu.

Old Zhuang was asking why Zhou Baishu’s son hadn’t come this time.

Zhou Baishu replied, “You mean A’Cheng?”

Old Zhuang nodded. “Yes, your kid—his name’s Zhou Qingcheng, right?”

Zhou Baishu nodded again. “That’s right. But I may not have mentioned before—he’s not my biological son. I just raised him.”

Old Zhuang thought to himself: What difference does it make whether he’s biological or not? He’s still your son.

After all, even Xiaoshi wasn’t his biological child.

Zhou Baishu continued, “He’s been very busy in the lab lately and couldn’t take time off, so I told him not to come with me.”

Old Zhuang hummed in understanding and vaguely recalled, “That kid is involved in some kind of research, right? Even classified stuff, not the same direction as yours.”

Zhou Baishu smiled. “Exactly. What I do doesn’t compare to his work. I can still travel around, visit experimental fields, and check on planting conditions. He, on the other hand, can’t leave the lab easily—it’s a hassle for him to go out.”

Old Zhuang nodded. “I get it, secret research.”

He added, “But your son is very filial. Every time you came to collect herbs, he would accompany you.”

“Yes, he’s very filial,” Zhou Baishu said, his tone full of pride. He sighed, “But what he does isn’t easy. Although many of our country’s technologies have surpassed others, there are still areas we’re trying to break through. The pressure now falls on these young kids. Innovation in science and technology is tough.”

Old Zhuang sighed as well. “That’s why I just want Xiaoshi to be happy—just to do what he wants and enjoy his life.”

As they spoke, Wen Chenxi and Zhuang Yanyu, hand in hand, caught up with them.

Old Zhuang and Zhou Baishu had intentionally walked ahead to give the younger folks their own space, knowing there was a generational gap and not wanting to intrude on their conversations.

When Zhou Baishu saw the two catching up, he was surprised. “How did you two catch up so quickly?”

He had just glanced back earlier and seen them walking leisurely far behind.

Wen Chenxi, composed and unruffled, replied, “We were just walking.”

Zhou Baishu was about to nod in acknowledgment when he froze, staring incredulously at their clasped hands.

Hand in hand?

His eyes darted to Old Zhuang, half-expecting him to grab a stick from the roadside and start swinging at Wen Chenxi.

Seeing that Old Zhuang wasn’t paying attention to their hands, Zhou Baishu breathed a sigh of relief.

He immediately turned his sharp gaze to Wen Chenxi, frowning as he signaled him: Let go! Are you trying to get yourself killed? Old Zhuang is right here!

Wen Chenxi didn’t seem to understand—or maybe he did and simply ignored it. Either way, he remained unmoved.

Zhou Baishu cursed inwardly: This reckless brat! Is he in that much of a hurry? Does he not care about the occasion?

To dare hold hands with Zhuang Yanyu in front of Old Zhuang—if Old Zhuang catches on and decides to separate them, where will he cry then?

Exasperated, Zhou Baishu stepped forward, pulling Wen Chenxi aside. “Come here. I need to talk to you.”

Wen Chenxi had no choice but to let go of Zhuang Yanyu’s hand. “Wait a moment,” he said calmly to Zhuang Yanyu before following Zhou Baishu to the side.

Zhou Baishu deliberately lowered his voice, saying, “Has your head been squashed by a file cabinet? Even if you really like Xiaoyu, you can’t go flaunting it in front of his dad like that! Luckily, Old Zhuang didn’t notice earlier, or else you’d be in big trouble…”

Wen Chenxi gave him a complicated look and asked, “Uncle Zhou, do you believe me?”

Zhou Baishu was puzzled. “Believe what?”

Wen Chenxi said calmly, “Even if I kissed Xiaoyu in front of Uncle Zhuang, he’d probably just think we’re close brothers.”

After all, this was the kind of father who could casually share conversations about chest muscle workouts with his son.

Zhou Baishu was speechless. “What?”

Wen Chenxi returned to Zhuang Yanyu’s side and, in front of the two elders, took his hand naturally. “Uncle Zhuang, Xiaoyu and I are going over there to take a look.”

Old Zhuang cheerfully waved them off. “Go ahead, go ahead.”

Watching the two walk away hand in hand, Zhou Baishu tentatively asked, “Old Zhuang, don’t you think… these two kids have a really close bond? I mean, look, they’re even holding hands.”

Old Zhuang nodded with a matter-of-fact expression. “Of course. They’re the best of brothers. Their relationship is as solid as steel.”

Zhou Baishu was rendered speechless.

—

Author’s Note:

PS—
Wen Chenxi: “Boldly kissing my ‘wife’ in front of my father-in-law without getting hit. I ask you, who else can pull this off besides me!?”
Old Zhuang: “Go ahead, try kissing him.”
Wen Chenxi: “Retracts his earlier statement.”

Feel free to donate for earlier/bonus chapter releases! Thanks for supporting me and enjoy reading 😀